Posted on February 18, 2013 by delilahnight
One of the most common questions a kid can ask is “Where do babies come from?” It’s actually a very simple question, and one that is asked quite understandably. But it’s often a question that freaks parents out. The answers run the gamut from the absurd (the stork) to the heteronormative (when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much) to the religious (God) to any number of other answers.
I’m proud to have backed What Makes a Baby via kickstarter when I was pregnant with my younger daughter.
I’m even more excited to share that it is available for pre-order from Amazon and BookDepository!.
I think this is the perfect book to start an honest discussion with your child about where they came from.
- It uses non gender specific language (some bodies have eggs, some bodies do not)
- It doesn’t assume that the bio parent is the person actually parenting the child (never uses the terms mommy/daddy)
- It mentions that sometimes the new thing made by a sperm and an egg doesn’t grow (which is important to me as the mom of a baby lost via miscarriage)
- It notes that all babies grown differently (which is a way to open a discussion about children with special needs)
- It notes that babies can be born via the vagina or through a special cut (Older daughter was a vaginal birth, her sister was a C-section)
- It asks “who was happy you were born?” rather than telling you that mommy and daddy or some sort of stereotype was what awaited the child.
In doing so, it legitimizes every child. Adopted, born of IVF, being raised by a parent and a step parent, the child of a single parent, and so forth.
I think this is a great book for kids 2-8. Obviously as they age, they’ll want to know more, but this is the only book I like that’s out there for the youngest kids. Please support Cory and Fiona and pre-order your copy for your child or a child in your life!
Filed under: books, Parenting, Pregnancy, Talking to your kids about sex, Toddlers | 2 Comments »
Posted on November 28, 2011 by delilahnight
The LM was fascinated by the idea that I had a baby in my uterus. She was curious (ish) about how the baby was going to come out.
She never once asked me how the baby got in there.
I will admit to being a bit deflated over this as I had my sex positive, age-appropriate answer all ready to go.
But just as sometimes our kids will ask us a question we are not prepared to answer, sometimes they’re not going to ask a question you are prepared to answer. The struggle is to know when to push to have a discussion and when to let it go.
The LM just turned three, so I’m okay with her lack of interest in how the baby got into my uterus. If she were five or six, I might have made a point of asking her if she had any questions about how the baby got into my uterus or what she knew about how babies get into a mommy’s uterus. With an older child, I might use a pregnancy as a jumping off point for a discussion about safe sex and having children when you want them.
If your child hasn’t asked you about sex, think about how old they are and question where they ARE getting their information from. Because chances are it’s probably full of misinformation. When I taught sex education to middle school students, I heard plenty of old myths that persist; you can’t get pregnant your first time (yes, you can), you can’t get pregnant when having your period (rare, but not impossible depending on your body’s fertility cycle, if it’s a true period as opposed to breakthrough bleeding, etc), and so forth. Knowledge is power, and it’s important to arm your child with age appropriate knowledge.
For now, it’s enough that the LM knows that babies grow in a woman’s uterus, that they can come out through the vulva or sometimes a doctor has to cut into the Mommy’s uterus (BG was a C-section so it was a necessary discussion) to take the baby out, and that they can drink milk from a bottle or from Mommy’s breasts. When she’s ready, we’ll bring up how her baby sister got there.
Filed under: Parenting, Pregnancy, Talking to your kids about sex, Toddlers | Leave a Comment »